Category Archives: Rocky Williams

New CANIDAE Grain Free Cat Food Gets Two Paws Up!

Pure chicken canBy Rocky Williams, Feline Guest Blogger

We interrupt our regularly scheduled catnap to bring you this impawtent bulletin:  new CANIDAE foodables have arrived!

It was an exciting day here when the man in the blue shorts delivered that big package, which the Warden said was all for me. Well, technically she said I had to share the noms with the other two furry inmates, but I was busy salivating so I wasn’t really paying any attention to that part. All I heard was that I would get to be a guinea pig and taste test some new grain free Pure formulas to give you my honest opinion of them. Catzowey! Life is good.

Now, being the foodie that I am, I may not be the best feline for the job of Cat Food Taste Tester but hey… you’ll never find anyone who throws themselves into their “work” with more enthusiasm than I do. Yep. Uh huh. I do love my noms. But even foodie cats like a little variety once in awhile, and since we only eat premium quality food at this five-star establishment, we ate the same two CANIDAE formulas all the time. Not any more!

With six new grain free flavors added to the CANIDAE line-up, mealtime just became the highlight of my day. Oh wait…it already was. The point is, now my furry inmates and I will get to mix it up a little. Even better, there are some interesting meats in these new foodables that we haven’t tried before – like duck, herring, rabbit, trout and lobster.
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How to Read Your Cat’s Mind

By Rocky Williams, feline guest blogger

Hi CANIDAE furiends! The Warden said I should be doing something productive – like writing a blog post for you – instead of catnapping all day and playing with my vast collection of furry mice all night. Say what? Just so you know, I actually think catnapping is very serious business when you’re a feline. However, I agreed to put my paws to the keyboard because the topic she suggested was How to Read Your Cat’s Mind and frankly, I’m pretty sure I am the Best Mancat for the job. I wrote the book on that. No wait. Technically I didn’t…but I could have!!

You see, reading your cat’s mind is really not that difficult, once you master the basics. It’s all about observing our behavior and our body language; what we do will tell you exactly what is on our devious feline minds. Every time! Let’s get started, shall we?

● When your cat jumps on the bed and licks your face in the wee hours of the morning, he’s not showing affection. He’s also not saying you are dirty and need a bath. No, this face-wetting behavior can mean only one thing: he thinks it’s high time you got up and dished out his breakfast of CANIDAE (that’s like a Breakfast of Champions for a cat!).

● When your cat jumps on the bed and proceeds to use your stomach as a trampoline – launching his lithe feline form across the bed, down to the floor and back to the other side, repeatedly – he’s not saying that he’s got pent up energy and wants to play. This behavior says the exact same thing as the face licking: get up and feed me NOW!!

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Thanksgiving from a Cat’s Perspective

By Rocky Williams, feline guest blogger

Some people might say that cats aren’t thankful for anything, because felines are all haughty creatures who think they’re entitled to everything and don’t appreciate stuff. Pshaw, I say!! It’s true we cats do think the world is our oyster and humans were put here to do our bidding (they were, right?) but we also recognize that it doesn’t always work out that way.

For sure, every kitty deserves a warm home with a loving family, lots of yummy food and treats (CANIDAE for me!), endless hours of head scritchin’ and petting, plenty of toys and catnip, and a comfy place to snooze the day away. But just because every kitty deserves all of those things does not mean we all have them.  Just like there are less fortunate humans who don’t have some of the things that make for a safe and happy life, so too are there kitties without the things that make us purr with contentment.

So when you all sit down to your Thanksgiving feast tomorrow and go round the table expressing your gratitude for this and that, you should know that your kitty is doing the same thing. Now, to the untrained eye – i.e. every human – it may look like all we’re doing is sleeping, hiding under the bed or calculating the risk/reward of stealing a nice big hunk of your juicy turkey. But that’s just our façade. Our Outward Kitty, if you will. You see, we put on a pretense because we don’t need people thinking that felines have gone all soft on ya’ll. But the truth is, we have always been soft. And I’m not just talking about our fur.

Every kitty who has it good, definitely knows and appreciates this. Despite whatever vibes Outward Kitty might be giving out, make no mistake that Inward Kitty (our true self) is thankful to be inside where it’s warm and cozy. Inward Kitty is thankful there is at least one special person willing to go to great lengths to make sure he’s well fed and well loved every day of the year. Inward Kitty is thankful that he knows what it’s like to feel truly safe.

Inward Kitty understands that he is one of the lucky ones, and although he may at times take certain things for granted (such as that bite of turkey you’re going to slip him under the table when you think no one is looking) he knows he is very blessed to have found you and saved you from a dreary cat-less life.

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

~Love and Kitty Licks,
Rocky

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A Cat’s Mother’s Day Letter to “Mom”

By Rocky Williams, feline guest blogger

Dear Mom,

I’ve heard people talking about a special day that was created to honor all Moms. What a great idea! But Momma, I’ve also heard that many human beans don’t think you should be honored on Mother’s Day because you “only” have cats which means “you’re not a real Mom.” Rubbish, I say!

When you rescued me and took me home, I was just a wee lad who fit into the palm of your hand. I don’t remember my other mother, but I do remember the loving care I got from you. Without your “mothering,” I daresay I wouldn’t have survived. You nurtured me and helped me grow into the beautiful cat I am today.

You’ve been my only mother for ten years, and you would never abandon me. Ever. And I know you’d move heaven and earth to make sure I am healthy and happy, for all of my life. Momma, isn’t that the heart and soul of what it means to be a mother?

There are so many things I love and appreciate about you, Momma. For starters, I love that you will sit on half a chair (or less) so as not to disturb me. Some beans would chase their kitty off the chair in order to sit in comfort, but that’s not how you roll! You let your legs fall asleep if I’m curled up on them, and you let me stay on your lap long after you really, really want – or need – to get up. (Sometimes I laugh when I see you frantically racing to your litterbox because, not wanting to disturb me, you’ve waited too long).

Momma, I know I am a lot naughtier than most felines, but I love that you never say “Why can’t you be like other cats?” You accept that being mischievous is who I am, and you don’t try to change me. It’s like that fable of the scorpion who convinces the frog to carry him across the river, promising not to sting him because then they’d both drown. But midway across, the scorpion does sting the frog, who cries “Why’d you sting me?” and the scorpion says “It’s my nature.” You know I can’t help being naughty any more than that scorpion could help stinging the frog, and it doesn’t make you love me any less.

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PURRfect Movies and TV Shows for Cats

By Rocky Williams, feline guest blogger

When a certain couch potato canine wrote recently of his preferred TV shows, I was naturally curious why he left out the ones we kitties enjoy. Well, more miffed really, because everyone knows cats do not like to be left out of anything. Ever! But my Warden said “Rocky, don’t get your fluffy tail in a twist. You can make your own list any time you feel like it.” Yes, but that involves work, something we cats avoid like the plague.

Ah well…I really needed a list of the movies and TV shows cats would dig, because I’m feeling all sloth-like lately, and what better way to be lazy than to watch TV all day? (They don’t call it the Boob Tube for nothing!) So I put paws to keyboard and came up with some cat-approved programs. When I ran out of my own ideas, I plagiarized other cats,  I mean, I asked my cat friends on Facebook for suggestions, and they were happy to share.

So kitties, send your Warden out for a big bag of those catabulous FELIDAE TidNips treats to munch on while you watch these shows, and you’ll be all set.

Animal Planet’s My Cat From Hell is a show every feline needs to watch. Just be sure to watch with your Warden, because I guarantee you that anything naughty YOU have ever done will pale in comparison to the Demon Katz on this show. Technically, these bad kitties are just misunderstood, and once they have their stupid hoomin trained, it all ends well. In any event, your Warden is bound to appreciate your angelic self after watching this show.

I like to watch The Little Mermaid movie, but for some reason it always makes me hungry. I think it’s because I can’t stop fantasizing about how many great seafood meals her ginormous tail would make. There would be enough stinky fishy goodness for every cat in town!

Finding Nemo is another obvious choice for seafood loving kitties. Alfred Hitchcock’s classic movie, The Birds, is also highly entertaining.

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The Naughty Kitty Chronicles

The Naughty Kitty

By Rocky Williams

That evil Warden of mine says when she looks in the dictionary under “Naughty Kitty” there is a photo of me. She also wants me to believe that under “Angel” there is a photo of Annabelle. Gag. Excuse me while I hack up a hairball and leave it where the Warden is sure to find it…with her bare feet!

I will admit that I probably am the naughtiest kitty on the planet. But I’ll bet you I have a lot more fun than my goody two shoes sister; wait, wouldn’t that be goody four-paws? Anyhoo, Annabelle is a good kitty and I am a naughty kitty. I DO know the difference, but I choose to be naughty because like I said, it makes life so much more interesting! What’s the point of being a feline if you can’t have a little fun?

Just in case there was any doubt as to what constitutes a good kitty versus a naughty kitty, I’ve put together a little primer.

The Good Kitty Versus the Naughty Kitty

A good kitty (Annabelle) doesn’t pay a lick of attention when the human is eating her food. A naughty kitty (me) gets their fluffy self in her face and tries to snag food from her plate right in front of her. My signature move is called the “grab and go” and I’m successful 9 times out of 10 because my paw is quicker than the hand.

A good kitty comes when called. A naughty kitty answers to none…unless there’s food involved, then we “pretend” to be obedient so we’ll get a snack. The Warden’s favorite trick to get a naughty kitty to come is to shake the tub of FELIDAE crunchies. Works like a charm!

A good kitty leaves all the pens, keys, note pads, remotes, and other miscellaneous stuff on the coffee table, right where the human put it. A naughty kitty pushes them all to the floor, then bats them around until they get lost under the furniture.

A good kitty barfs on the easy-to-clean linoleum or tile floor. A naughty kitty chooses to do the deed on the carpet or the human’s important work papers. Extra credit if your furball ruins some prized possession that “just happens” to be in the way.

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